Best Laid Plans

A final serious thought about the wedding.

Weddings obviously mark the beginning of a life that is intended to last "'til death do us part." But statistically, around half of the marriages don't last. The reasons are countless. Countless too, are the emotions you can observe at different stages of the wedding and reception.

The father of bride walks his "little girl" down the isle. The mother of the bride stresses over....just about everything. Many of the guys can't wait for the service to be over, so we can get to the open bar. The girls at the wedding are soaking it all in - either dreaming of their day, or remembering what is was like for them.

Which brings me to the point of today's blog. During the groom's speech, he was talking about how in love he was, how happy she makes him and how he will love her forever. I looked around the room and saw one woman crying. She had heard those words too, at her wedding not long before. Except now, she's at this wedding alone, while her ex-husband is out goofing off with another woman.

What happened? It's only been a couple of years.
I remember how happy I was.
We had such a good thing going, what went wrong?

If you don't take anything else with you from what I write, take this.
Marriage is hard work and it IS NOT based on emotion. Go back to Monday's post about love being a choice. We must work at this and choose to make it work.

I'm writing a book on relationships for men. There are tons of tips and things that you can do to sweep your woman off her feet. But ultimately, it comes down to you and her making a decision to make it work. And in the end, it's worth it.

Stay in touch -

Mark

Love is a Choice

My wife and I attended a wedding this weekend, and several noteworthy things were said and done. Weddings are interesting because they can be used as good reminders of how we felt when we said "I do." It can conjure up thoughts of the ideal marriage, remind us of our vows and promises and encourage us to get focused on some very important topics.

The blog this entire week will be devoted to things I heard, observed and learned at this past weekend's wedding.

The pastor at this small Anglican church commented on those very familiar words from First Corinthians 13 (Love is kind, doesn't envy, etc). But the next passage was from Colossians 3, verse 14: "but above all these things, put on love." The pastor reminded us that love is a choice. "Every morning when you wake up, make the choice to love your partner. And remind yourself of that choice every night before you go to bed."

Wise words. When we first meet, emotions carry us into love. But emotions don't last, and love is not an emotion. Love is a choice. Love is a verb - an action.

Today and every day, choose to "put on love". Wear it. And remember, when you're wearing something, others can see it. I'm wearing a Phillies hat as I write this. I wear it so people know I'm a fan. I put on my love for my wife. People see that too. They know by my actions that I'm a fan of hers. I love, by choice.

Stay in touch -

Mark